As the Culture Warriors battle it out in their never-ending quest for general cultural supremacy, they not only wound each other but manage to land a few blows on bystanders whose only crime is standing within earshot. This week, stories of those who have been taken a few punches from the Culture Warriors, even though they may not have been the intended target.

Well Those Christians Get on my Nerves Many conservative culture warriors have framed their fight as a crusade to keep the U.S. a "Christian nation" (as if it were ever a Christian nation in the first place). Unsurprisingly, this has led a large portion of non-Christians to conclude that Christians are annoying and hypocritical, and has prompted moderate Christians to say thanks but no thanks to those Culture Warriors who "speak for" all Christians.

I am Not a Muslim...not that There's Anything Wrong With That Okay okay. We grant that some culture warriors are actually are trying to damage the reputation of Muslims and Islam, but most at least claim that their qualm is with "extremism." Fine. It actually doesn't matter much. The Culture Warriors have managed to inflict enough damage to the reputation of one of the great world religions that presidential candidates actually have to take time out of nationally televised debates to address rumors circulating online and employ some rather Seinfeldian rhetorical flourishes in the mean time.

Ok, I'm Going to Wrap This Up Before the List Gets Too Long Culture War Watch has just realized that when you start to number those hurt by the Culture Warriors you're basically counting the whole world. So, here's one last post to sum it all up. During this year's "war on Christmas" the culture warriors showed their dedication to style over substance. While the U.S. heads into a recession and the planet develops a fever, culture warriors are busy thanking Wal-Mart for saying "Merry Christmas." Thanks Culture Warriors! We'll send in our thank you note shortly. It might be a bit late since we're trying to help the Common Do-Gooders bring us back from the brink of economic despair and the extinction of our species. Please forgive our rudeness.

The Scorecard: Even though I didn't write much about the Common Do-Gooders, I'm too depressed now to give the Culture Warriors any more points after writing this post. Do-Gooders get the week.